Here Now & Always Forever

I used to think that love existed in the past, but that is never the case with love. Past love is just that, something experienced in the past, often remembered through the lens of nostalgia or felt with sorrow when lost or broken. Both types of past love (nostalgia and sorrow) are deeply felt in the depths of our hearts.

You might easily believe that God designed the human heart to be a tabernacle for love, but that does not seem to be the case. Yes, our memories are stored in our minds and in our hearts, but love is not truly kept, be that in our hearts or elsewhere. Love cannot be stored nor retrieved. Love is a choice, not a feeling, in the here and now. Love is not an act of the heart, but an act of the will in the present moment. Love is sustainable in the present moment but only by grace, which sustains love always and forever.

Love is only possible in the present moment or something that awaits us always and forever. Love truly exists only in the here and now. And we must choose to participate in love. If we wait for love, then we are really only experiencing the anticipation of love, not love itself. The love that awaits us is accessible only through the present moment. That is why to continue to love, grace is necessary. God sustains us in his love, which is ever present. So with the power of grace, we are capable of continually choosing to love now and always.

Love exists like music. You have memories of hearing the music, its melody, and its lyrics, if applicable. However, music, like love, exists when made present in the here and now. For example, if you are like me, you might struggle to recall the tune or lyrics to a song until someone whistles the tune or recites the chorus, until the music is made present. The music is known by making it present in the here and now. Yes, there might be a distinction between recorded music and live music, but recorded music is only known when played as if it were live, as if it were present in the here and now. Recorded music is live music imitated, like a greeting card or a love letter. We desire live music over recorded music, just as we need love in the present moment instead of recalling past love or anticipating future love. Even a love letter attempts to make love present by connecting the person to remembered love or to anticipated love, promised to be made present in the future.

Believing that love awaits us is how we have hope for the future. We are in need of faith as we eagerly anticipate the giving and receiving of love. Faith or trust in the person who promises love is essential if one has hope that such anticipated love is to be made present. We have hope if we trust in the promise of love. 

With God, who is love, love awaits us continually and so love is always at hand. That is the reign of God, here at hand now, and always forever. This here and always is only possible with God, for He is the source of love. Ultimately God promises the love that is forever made present in Heaven. Yet God makes possible for love to be made present now, despite our sinful nature. That is why the Paschal Mystery of Christ is key to both the promise and the reality of love. In Christ, love is made present here now, and love awaits us always and forever in Heaven.

The Wall of Your Heart

When affairs of the heart are involved, there is a wall often deployed to protect the heart from potential or perceived harm. Call this a security feature or defense mechanism. Yet the wall of the heart is not there to only protect from harm but also to contain all that loves. This is a wonderful design by God. Yet like most things in a fallen world, the designs of God are often twisted in their misuse.

The wall of the heart surrounds the sanctuary of the heart, that innermost, intimate aspect of the person that holds love in a constant embrace. This embrace of love is an act of perpetual motion in the heart, yet also an experience of peaceful stillness. The wall is secured in its foundation to hold that stillness within the sanctuary of the heart. The protected sanctuary in the splendor of its brilliance vibrates from that perpetual embrace of love. This is the basic activity of the heart.

The sanctuary of the heart is where God dwells, waits for us, walks with us, abides in us. To enter this sanctuary is properly by invitation only for others because intimacy of the heart is reserved for God and for those whom God has set aside for us and presents to us for life and love.

You might be too open with others by allowing the light from the sanctuary of the heart to shine forth, causing blindness to those invited but who are not prepared to receive your heart. Or the light might break open the darkness allowing love to shine forth. That is the risk of being vulnerable with another person. Such vulnerability is the space where the heart can thrive in love or experience great loss.

The wall of the heart is that of a barrier. Yet one can work on building up this barrier of the heart to be so tall, so thick, so massive that nothing can break it down. If the heart is overly protected, then the heart hardens, and the sanctuary of the heart becomes a void. The barrier then becomes so impenetrable that no light can shine in the heart, no rain can wash the heart clean, no wind can break through the emptiness. The barrier wall of the heart is there to withstand the storms that can overwhelm us. The wall is there to protect the sanctuary, yes, but never to harden the heart.

The wall of your heart is intended to be permanent yet supple. The wall is a permanent barrier only like a protective coating, an outer layer of defending what is inside. The wall of your heart needs to be strengthen by the experiences of both love and loss. So grace is essential and necessary to express love properly and endure loss salvifically.

Anything that impacts the wall can strengthen your heart properly, to become what God intended in his design, if your heart accepts grace. The more the wall takes, the stronger the heart can become because it is able to bend with grace, but never break against the storms. That is why the wall of your heart is to be supple by the power of grace. 

The wall of your heart is to be translucent allowing light to shine through, so darkness may not take its hold on your heart. The wall of your heart is to be permeable allowing rain to wash away what drowns it and soak in what nourishes your heart.

The heart is after all a muscular organ that functions like any muscle, being used strengthens it. A strong heart filled with grace pushes through the storms. A grace-strong heart keeps pumping even when the work seems too much. And a heart strengthen with grace flourishes in the design of God's plan for life and love.

Men Have Been Failing Women

Too many men have failed women. Perhaps this is just a reality of our fallen, sinful nature. But Christian men are called to go beyond the norms of society and to be counter culture.

Christian men, we need to ask ourselves: How have we failed to honor and uphold the dignity of women and girls? We, Christian men, have been empowered by the grace of Baptism. Yet too many of us continue to ignore, neglect, or even worse, despise grace. We have the grace necessary, now we need to find the courage and wisdom to change for the sake of women.

Christian men, repent and believe again in God's plan for life and love. Humble yourself before the Lord and then raise your banner for Christ.

Brothers, what have done today to honor the dignity of your sisters in Christ? Tell your sister that she is important to you and that you will stand between her and harm. And then do so, every day!

Fathers, how have you lifted your daughters of God so they know and believe they are cherished? Tell your daughter that she is precious in your eyes and in the eyes of the Lord. And then show her every hour!

Husbands, husbands! Shame on those men who desecrate any woman! She is a Tabernacle for Life! That is by God's design. Your gaze belongs to your wife, and no other! Your thoughts must come from a place of praise. Do you not realize the treasure that God has made in woman? Do you not realize she, your wife, was given to you by God? When you place work, power, prestige, sports, another person, or any earthly endeavor above her, you commit not only adultery, you commit idolatry. Tell your wife that she alone is your beloved. Tell her that you love her whatever the costs, no sacrifice for her is too great, no other person more valued than her. And then prove your valor every moment!

I do not chastise my brothers in Christ as one who is sinless or blameless. I stand before you brothers guilty. I am ashamed that I have neglect my duty. I was not there sufficiently either. I too have failed our sisters too often. But no longer! 

I humble myself before God, seeking His mercy and strength. I claim my inheritance as a son of God, called to remain no longer silent in the face of this evil we men have caused. I take up arms with those brothers of mine who too will carry this banner for Christ with me, for the sake of our sisters, for the sake of our daughters, for the sake of our wives, for the sake of every woman and for every girl.

Catechesis Is a Joke

I have never been good at telling a joke. Why? Because I usually remember the punch line but rarely know how to get there. A joke isn't just about the punch line, it's mostly about how you get to the punch line.

If you are good at telling a joke, then you are able to provide an engaging narrative that leads to the inevitable, wait for it, punch line. And we really must wait for the punch line to truly get the joke.

This is why I think catechesis is a joke. Catechesis is mostly about getting to the punch line. Catechesis relies on the narrative that leads one to eagerly wait for the punch line, which is doctrine. But if you start off with the punch line, the doctrine, then your audience won't get the joke, won't understand your point, won't get the catechesis. To do effective catechesis, you must be willing to tell it like a good joke. You must be willing to wait before you reveal the doctrine.

In my line of work, I see too many in the authority of the Church who are terrible at telling a joke. They are like me, they just get to the punch line too soon. Or worse yet, when they do wait to reveal the doctrine, they have little clue on how to get there.

A good comedian, like a good catechist, knows the situation, knows the audience, and knows the flow and timing of telling the joke. If your narrative is ignorant of where your audience comes from, then the joke falls flat. If your narrative is insensitive to the makeup of the audience, then the joke can fall flat too. If your style or presentation doesn't fit the joke, then it again will fall flat. Ultimately a good comedian knows the joke worked when the audience laughs. And most often getting the audience to laugh requires taking some well-thought-out risks. 

We as catechists must be patient on revealing doctrine. We must be willing to take some calculated risks. We must craft the narrative well so when we finally do reveal the doctrine, those listening to us will laugh. This is why catechesis is a joke.

The Beauty & Horror of Language

Have you ever imagined your existence without language? Is not language our greatest means of communication? How would we live without language?

Language, though natural to our earthly existence, is something beautiful to behold as well as a cause of much horror in history. A specific language might be the issue at hand, for it may not be adequate in describing or expressing what we experience. Too often the powerful use of language has resulted in heartbreaks, civil unrest, and global wars. Yet verbal and written forms of language have lead to reconciliation, many peace accords, and many loving relationships.

A man and a woman commit to a liftetime with unique spoken words, treasured as vows. Those vows are then translated in an incarnational expression through the language of their bodies. Two nations join forces with their written vows, documented as a treaty and are made incarnational througg mutual immigration and sharing of resource. Yet such language has also resulted in too many conflicts between individuals and between nations. Language has also led to divorce and war. The horror of that kind of expression of language is a culture of death. So in both the beauty and horror of language, we find its many forms, beyond verbal and written.

Language may be expressed in bodily actions that perhaps have a range more vast than verbal. We express in the language of our bodies so much more than what words can say. Beauty touches eternity when a husband and wife express their conjugal love, seeking to say to one another I am yours, my beloved, freely, fully, faithfully, and forever. The language of marital love is so potent, it can be procreative. What beauty marital love is that two become one, and in their oneness with God, new human life may come forth into the world. That is powerful and good.

And the power of bodily language can be found elsewhere: peaceful protests or violent riots, a gentle hug or punch in the gut, and many other obvious examples. Yet what happens when even our bodily language is confusing or contradictory? What happens when action and intent are not understood because others with whom we are attempting to communicate do not understand the language we are using. What does bowing down mean, for example?

Language is confusing but necessary, not a necessary evil, just necessary. Language seems to be more neutral if one considers it the medium upon which persons converse. Yet it is often misunderstood or misused because of its subjective aspect. Those person using the medium of language must synchronize or blend their use else neither side is understood. And that's why the confusion can quickly lead to unintentional horror or accidental beauty because of interpretation.

Language is most profound in its both beautiful and horrific results. The same medium, language, can lead to either beauty or horror,  depending upon its use by both sides of conversation. If both sides seek mutual understanding in their use of language, then beauty is born and expressed. Otherwise we live in horror.

I Am Here for You

"Satan's heights are the heights of doing things on one's own authority, of uninhibitedly determining oneself in possessing all things and being permitted all things... The height of the mountain of crucifixion consists of Jesus' having relinquished all possessions and privileges all the way down to the pure nothingness of complete nakedness, which then does not even have a place on the ground any more."

-Pope Benedict XVI (Cardinal Ratzinger), A New Song for the Lord

What strikes me most here is the simplicity one is left with upon reflecting on the Pope's words: the way of life is found in giving, for in giving, we receive.

So you find yourself, NOT by defining yourself according to your own authority. You find yourself by losing yourself, by offering the gift of yourself for the sake of others, by sacrificing self-determination for redemptive love. 

That is like looking in the mirror and saying, "Today is not about me. I am here for someone else. I need to focus really well on listening to others, seeing others, and being there for someone else." 

This isn't about you trying to do or be for everyone all the time.  That is impossible, and is evident by the fact that doing such ends up being about you.

This is about being there for one other person who isn't you. Allowing your inward focus to die, so that your outward attention may grow. This about living out, "I am here for you."

The Gradual Battle Within

A popular video clip of Jordan Peterson has been making its rounds on social media of late. In The Joe Rogan Experience #877, published in 2016, Dr. Peterson explains how freedom is taken away in such a way that we don't realize it while it is happening:

"This is how your freedom is taken. Things get to terrible places one tiny step at a time. If I encroach you and I'm sophisticated about it, I'm going to encroach two millimetres. I'm going to encroach right to the point where you begin to protest. Then I'm going to stop.

Then I'm going to wait. I'm going to encroach again, right to the point where you protest. I'm going to stop. And then I'm going to wait. I'm just going to do that forever. Before you know it, you're going to be back three miles from where you started.

And you'll have done it one step at a time. You'll ask "Oh, how did I get here?". The answer is "Well, I pushed you a little farther than you should have gone, and you agreed."

I believe this encroachment comes from the Enemy within. This encroachment strategy is in fact a twisting of the virtuous path to conquering evil and overcoming sin. That is how insidious the erosion of freedom is for each of us. Not just freedom outside us, but most importantly that authentic freedom within us that enables us to be our true selves, the person God calls each of us to be.

The mystic Henry Suso, in his The Little Book of Eternal Wisdom, wrote that a timid knight is necessary to conquer the Enemy. Suso said, 

"[T]he mountain is high and the way slippery; it cannot be climbed with one joust but with repeated attacks. 

Here we need a timid knight who, because of the superior power of the enemy, first draws back and only gains ground gradually. This is the sort of battle good men carry on during their entire lifetime."

The battle within has taken a turn for the worse, twisted to the point that the gradual gains have become gradual encroachments. To change we must first recognize the direction we are heading is south because if we do not know for sure, we assume we always head north correctly. We must reorient ourselves with a compass. Until that happens, we will assume falsely that we are directing ourselves correctly. This compass must rely on the field that surrounds us, not of our own making but a field beyond our own doing. This compass I speak of is the moral compass that detects the field of God's plan.

With God's compass in hand, I must become that timid knight, timid or patient in step yet bold in conviction. My conviction comes from trusting in God's compass, knowing in my heart that I need and desire to head north. So my first step is turning away from the south and face north. Then I abide in that moment, facing north. Keeping my eyes fixed on my compass pointing north, I take just one small step forward, nothing more. I must train myself slowly to step north. If I move too fast I will become disoriented because the Enemy is always behind me, trying to confuse my mind and deceive my eyes. I must keep my mind clear of the distracting temptations behind me and trust in that inner calling that comes from beyond me, in front of me, a beacon from the north.

The gradual battle within is fought by keeping north, one patient step at a time. For by each, slow, and focused step, I am growing stronger in patience. So the next patient step is made with even greater conviction. And that conviction within me strengthens my outer self, my armor that I put on me to in some ways automatically deflect the now soft blows of the Enemy who keeps behind me.

With each advancing, patient step I take to the north, I defeat the gradual battles within because I gradually become more aware of who I am, who I am called to be. I am not my own because I am not alone. I walk in this battle within with God always in front of me.